Is It Weird If?

A list of thoughts from close encounters of the week.

  • I don’t know how to chop vegetables?
    • How do you hold a mushroom when you slice it?
    • Do I peel the garlic first?
    • The whole garlic or just the little piece?
    • Why are my eyes burning? I thought that was just onions?
  • I don’t know what is happening when I go to Wholefoods?
    • Why is there no regular salt & pepper?!
    • Does my produce need a sticker?
    • Why are there so many types of cheese?
    • WHERE IS MY MOM?
  • Where do you buy stamps?
    • Yes I know they’re at a grocery store but WHICH grocery store and
    • WHERE do you get them? Is there an aisle?
  • How often do succulents need watering?
    • Aren’t they supposed to be trendy because they’re easy?
    • Don’t succulents live in the desert?
      • or is that just cacti…?
  • If my grade is 40% participation, do I HAVE to raise my hand?
    • Do I get docked points for missing a day if I’m sick?
    • Do I need to speak once a class?
    • Or do I need to just speak more than someone else?
  • If I can’t hear my neighbors, does that mean they can’t hear me?
    • Do I even have neighbors?
    • Can they hear my music?
    • What about my conversations?
  • Do people actually notice when you’re gross?
    • Yes I had pit stains from walking in the heat but they’re gone now so do they still KNOW?
    • I swear my hair didn’t look like this when I left the house, it’s the HUMIDITY.
  • How many snacks are too many snacks?
    • When do the snacks become a meal?
    • Can I technically eat 3 meals continuously all day…so it’s…one meal?
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